During a recent quest to better understand my relationship with God and to hopefully improve that relationship, I posted on Facebook about the difference between loving God and being IN love with him. Is there a difference? What is the difference?
It seems to me that in our language at least, being IN love denotes a more intimate, exclusive-type relationship. After all, we are usually only IN love with one person, correct? I know I’m only in love with my husband although I love others very deeply. My relationship with my husband is unique, intimate and exclusive.
So why shouldn’t we strive for that type of relationship with God?, I wondered. Shouldn’t we desire to be IN love with God and not just love him?
If you can’t tell already, I’m the type of person to think and speak in questions and the trend continued. I believe we should have an intimate, IN love relationship with God, but the next question is, how does one accomplish that?
I searched for “loving God” through the concordance, and found thousands of references. It seems that our commands are clear:
In Deuteronomy 6:5, we are commanded, “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”
Pretty straight forward, but not necessarily simple.
Something else I found made me stop and think even more. Deuteronomy 11:1 says, “Love the LORD your God and keep his requirements, his decrees, his laws and his commands always.”
There, the command to love God is separate from keeping his requirements, etc. While I believe we should keep his commands in obedience and out of love for him, I take that as keeping his commandments consistently is not necessarily HOW we know we love him.
Understanding better how we should love him still doesn’t answer the question of knowing if we are IN love with God or simply love him, however. Many Christians, I believe, have been taught that if we feel an emotional high then we know we love God. That lesson has either been taught directly and indirectly throughout modern church history, I believe. But anyone who has been married knows that sometimes the times we love our spouse the most is during the times when that emotional high, that “heart flutter” just isn’t there. True love isn’t about emotion, it’s about commitment.
So where is she going with all this, you might be asking yourself. When I posed many of these questions on Facebook, an amazing array of comments came in and it not only helped me better understand my relationship with God, but it created a dialogue that was a blessing, I believe, for many people. People were able to interact and express how they love God and what that means.
So, I’m bringing the discussion to Daily Jesus. Do you believe we should be IN love with God or is that just semantics? How do you know that you love God? How does one achieve loving God in the manner that we are required?
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4 Responses to “Loving God-the discussion”
I think you just know. If there was some sign that one loved God with everything, we would labor to demonstrate that EXTERIOR "sign." When I knew I wanted to marry my wife, I just knew. I don't know how else to explain it. For me, living in the ecstasy of loving God comes from knowing how much He loves me. He is indescribably big and indescribably powerful, yet He calls me son. I, who am but dust and ashes, am a son of God and the center of His universe. He chose me from the foundation of the world to be His dwelling place. I can't imagine not falling in love with Him after knowing how much He desires me even though He is God and I am man. It gives me goosebumps. We love Him because He first loves us. That takes all the pressure off. I don't have to focus on loving Him because it's a natural result of me simply dwelling on His love for me.
I believe we should be in love with God as well and one of the ways that we know how we can express that love to God is not only through our commitment to Him but also through our actions and attitudes that should express our love to Him. Great thought provoking post!
Thanks to both of you who have responded, sorry I'm a bit behind on comments!
Jordan, you raise a very good point that loving God should be and is a natural result of him loving us, or at least our acknowledgment of that love. I think what made me ponder this goes back to how I perceived what I was taught as a child. Those who were "in love" or just really loved God seemed so fired up and excited about it. I struggle to feel that way, but I also know in my head and my heart that an emotional high is not a true indicator of feelings. As you said, striving for some outward sign isn't the goal here.
For me, my relationship with God is more of a sense of …. confused awe. Perhaps confused isn't the right word. What I mean is, what God does for us and did for us is so amazing and so difficult to comprehend in my little human brain that I know I can never full grasp it. And I'm OK with that, because it leaves me wanting even more. Wanting to know God more, follow his will more and develop a relationship with him.
Curtis,
Thanks for commenting as well! You say that we should be in love with God as well, but how do you know the difference between being in love and loving? Or is it even possible to achieve that level of commitment by trying? It seems to me that part of this process is done through God's grace and glory…he brings us closer to him as we open our hearts and submit our will to him. It seems to me that obedience is not only self preserving (good for us), but an act of worship (giving God the glory he so richly deserves).
I hope all this makes sense!
"Confused Awe" – I like that. I think a relationship with God that lacks this sort of ecstatic mystery is a relationship that is lacking God. Living in the tension of knowing the height, depth, and breadth of His love and His view of us and then looking in the mirror and saying to God, "What I'm seeing contradicts what You're saying about me, but I'll believe what you say rather than what I see." It's such a mysterious thing yet so indescribably wonderful.